This is an oldie, but cute!
A Polish man married a Canadian girl..
Being in Canada for a year or so;
although his English was far from
perfect, they got along very well.
Until one day he rushed into a lawyer's
office and asked him if he could
arrange a divorce for him, "very quick."
The lawyer said that the speed for
getting a divorce would depend on the
circumstances, and asked him the following questions:
LAWYER: "Have you any grounds?"
POLE: "Ja, Ja, an acre and half and a nice little home with 3 bedrooms."
LAWYER: "No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
POLE: "It is made of concrete, brick, and mortar," he responded.
LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
POLE: "No, he replied, "we have a two carport, and have never really needed one."
LAWYER: "I mean, what are your relations like?"
POLE: " All my relations are in Poland."
LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLE: " Yes, we have Hi fidelity, Stereo set &DVD player with four speakers
- We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes."
LAWYER: " No, I mean, "Does your wife beat you up?"
POLE: "No, I am always up before her".
LAWYER: " Is your wife a nagger?"
POLE: " No, she white".
LAWYER: " Why do you want this divorce?"
POLE: " She going to kill me."
LAWYER: " What makes you think that?"
POLE: " I got proof."
LAWYER: " What kind of proof?"
POLE: " She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, it says; 'Polish Remover'.